Yet another Sakebito Drinking Game!

This game is all about the amount of gulps it takes to knock back a Boilermaker.  For those unaware of what a Boilermaker is, it's when you drop a shot of liquor into about half a beer poured into a glass, and then you pound it down.  I have been enlightened to this thing called a Geordie Bomb. Which is a Boilermaker with Newcastle as the beer and Jagermeister and the liquor.

Anyone who knows anything at all about me, knows the love I have for Jagermeister.

Anyways, the game goes like this...

BOILERMAKER GOLF!!!

Lowest score at the end of the evening wins.
Chug your Boilermaker and count the amount of gulps it takes. Then tally your score using these rules:

1 = A Winner is you!
2 = -1 points
3 = PUROFEKKUTO! 0 points
4 = Botch. Game over. A Loser is you!
5 is a point, 6 is two points, so far and so forth.

and after 2 rounds this evening, my score is 1.

Me and Deliquents

So, I was exposing Matto-Kun to the greatness of Kishidan and it made me think of my days as a Guru to the up and coming delinquents in the south side of Salinas..

Admit it, that is some proper delinquency.

Ya know, there was a time in my life where I saw a group of kids from Salinas High that were dead set on becoming juvenile delinquents, so I felt an odd sense of duty to make sure that they were proper in their delinquency.  In hindsight, that is probably why I loved all 3 seasons of Gokusen.  Yankumi taught those Yankii kids how to be proper delinquents, but I digress.

Sure, Mike Bakeman (may he Rest In Peace) referred to them as my "Fan Club" but that's only because he couldn't see past the ego flex I got from these kids looking up to me and shit, but it was far more than that to me. I was invested in these kids' progress.  Even when they got pinched and did some time...how they took it mattered to me.  When one took it like a champ, I felt pride.  When one rolled like a bitch, or got caught up in the trappings of being inside, I felt a serious sense of disappoint.

Fucking shit, Lil One is probably my best success story out of everyone back then.  She's got a man who everyone says is worthy (even Morganthaler approves, that's saying something) a career slinging ink like a boss, and her shit is fully together.  I think I can claim a bit for credit for how others turned out, but she's the stand out, fer realsies.

There's a bit of regrets with that one, but we'll just let that go.  Past is past.

Anyways, I do attempt a bit when I encounter that brand of kid at work, to help 'em out and try to pass on some wisdom in their general direction, but I highly doubt I'll ever find myself in that situation again.  Closest thing to it is how I am with Matto-Kun.  Then again, last time I was back 'home' more than once I heard the phrase, "He's like a younger you, ain't he?"

And based on what I've heard some out of his mouth, originally sourced and shit, I don't think I can argue it much.

Hopefully, he carries the torch that I once so proudly carried.  

Bill versus Billy

Had a customer today who did the whole, "scan the name tag, then look you in the face" thing and then called me "Bill" even though the name tag says "Billy".  Which kind of made me do a take, because here in North Dakota, I'm Billy, back in California, I'm Bill and it got me to thinking about the differences between Bill and Billy.  And those differences do exist.

Bill
Bill is/was the subject of myth and legend.  Seriously.  A comment in passing at The Pit sent an entire crew of Bulletheads into high alert.  Bill didn't need to lock the door to the apartment in the fucking barrio, even though they were the token honky in the LITERAL projects.  As recently as a year (or so) ago, at a party, I met a new person and he was all, "I know who you are, man.  You're kinda legendary."  There is a lot to live up to as Bill.  Honestly, sometimes being Bill was/is kind of a chore.

Billy
Billy was who I was all through school.  Billy only recently resurfaced as I moved to North Dakota.  Billy is a "worker bee"  Billy is happy just being an awesome cog in the machine.  Billy is the one with MS. Billy is still an awesome human being, without a doubt, but Billy doesn't have the expectations/baggage that Bill does.  Not by a long shot.  Billy is also a lot less stressed out about things than Bill was.  That's for sure.  Billy is also a responsible fucker.  Billy pays his bills, shows up early for work, saves his cash.  Bill did NONE of those things.

So yeah, that about covers the differences between who Bill is and who Billy is, even though, I'm just one dude....

One and Seven

So, I stepped outside myself and examined the ritualized behavior that I engage in on a daily basis and have determined the following:

On an average day, I drink one beer and seven shots of Jagermeister.  Hence this blog post's title of One and Seven.

Not to mention the copious amounts of cannabis I imbibe.  Before work, it's only a couple tokes, to know the pain down; after work, I go for "blindfold me with dental floss" baked!

But to get back to the ritualized behavior, I find myself married to the "shot-smoke-shot" spot.  I have a Geordie Bomb, then nurse the rest of the beer as I get the work off of me. Medicate, then do the first round of 3S.  Eat some food, fuck around, medicate some more, then another 3S.  Sometimes I call it a night at this point, sometimes I go for another round or two, but usually I wrap things up after the seventh.  If I don't complete the circuit, it will actually keep me up at night and shit.  Like, I won't be able to sleep until I do that last shot...or that first shot, for that matter.

I was never this level of ritualized behavior prior to the MS, I swear!

The List

As part of my following the Tao, I have discarded many desires to become more enlightened.  One of those desires that I have discarded was the carnal desire.  However, while I have discarded those desires, I do still enjoy the beauty of the female form.  In some cases, so much, I would dumpster dive for that carnal desire that I discarded.  The following is a list of those who I would fully dumpster dive for.

Yuka Hirata

....she's all that is woman!

Yeah, I have a mini-song just for this chick.  The way she played Mele in Gekiranger...with both mischief and devotion.  Mele's loyalty to Ryo...and just the fact that she did proper ACTING....holy fuck.  Yeah, it doesn't hurt that she's smoking hot, either...

Kat Dennings

I do dig squishy chicks and when that squishy chick can be so snarky and hot at the same time?

Oh yeah, I've watched utter shit just because she was in it.

Nao Nagasawa

Yes, HurricanBlue was a reason why I watched that shit of a series Hurricanger.

And I mark out whenever she guest spots on series like Kamen Rider Fourze.

Amanda Righetti

As if I needed a reason other than Simon Baker's portrayal of Patrick Layne to watch The Mentalist....

Serious, ginger hotness is hotness that is ginger... *drool*

HIZAKI

 OK, I know that this is a male.


I also know that there is enough tequila for me to ignore that fact.  To quote the Macho Man, "It ain't gay if there's nothing in ya, dude!"

Ai Kago 

  There is a reason why this bird was the wife of Hank Hooligan.

She's a nut bar, and she smokes, and she loves to eat, and she's a nut bar.  I so much lessthanthree this bird.  Her jazz standards are top shelf.

Megan Massacre

 This level of hotness AND she can sling ink like a boss?  OK, sign me up!

 

I kinda wish that I could post pics of people I see in my daily life, like the Statuesque Ginger from Sport About, or the Chick That Looks Like Delores O'Riordan's Hot Little Sister, or Dark Haired Ukrainian Chick, or Lotto Jan (Yeah, I would SOOO much make her walk on her shoulder blades, just because she's awesome and could use that kind of O in her life)

But yeah, that's pretty much the List as it stands currently.  Not saying that more names won't be added later, especially if I'm on the receiving end of a mouth hug, I do have a Y chromosome, after all....

Sakebito Schlerosis Stories

Don't want to add to the pity party in the MS groups, so I'm gonna vent this shit here.

Today was a meds day (elbow dropped my Chinese hamster ovaries, even had a pic made about it)

 and I come in to work with a later start so I can nap them off (my well-established erratic sleeping patterns make doing it before going to bed an issue) and then go in for work in a state that's semi-human.  However, I didn't get like a proper nap, only lightly dozed, so I was really worthless today.  Like even Moms was worrying over how I was going through the motions of daily life, which is kinda weird because Friday injects, on the back of my arm (I set the auto-injector standing up on my desk and then "do an elbow drop" on the top of it and trigger the Corporate Colored Sonic Screwdriver)) have usually been my easiest day, both in pain and site reaction.  As long as I can nap them off, I'm pretty decent, at least until the ibuprofen I took about an hour before injecting wears off and I get all flu-like again.

Anyways, after the Regional Manager, Kevin (who is here covering things while my Manager is out of town on a family emergency thing) actually hung around and worked the register while I took care of doing the closing stuff out in the lobby (and taught him about how I time the closing duties and why I wait until this time to do that thing and junk and stuff) Moms rolls in and Kevin's outside smoking and they chat a bit....whatevs.

Wasn't until later I found out that she was all, "I'm so glad you stuck around because Billy was having a tough time with his meds today."

Shit.

But when she tells me this, it's right after I decide to break into the emergency supply of cannabis, and she's all, "It's like I got my old son back!"

I was fucking choked up over that, fer realsies.  It wasn't until later that the "Shit." moment happened, when my brain started properly grasping the details of the story.  I've worked hard to regain as much of my pre-MS awesomeness as possible....I take pride in the gains I've made and kinda dig it when people find out and have no idea that I'm impaired the way I am.  The fact that she could tell and that she would clue Kevin in to the fact that I was not at my usual levels of awesomeness both kinda horrify me.  Spotting it?  OK.  You're Moms, you're gonna notice that shit, but to break my kayfabe like that?  I was doing a fairly decent job (IMO) of faking the funk. 

I had wondered why he got all 20 questions about my shitty shit while I was closing down the main till and doing the Store Close in the system.  Funny how a single fact makes everything clear.  And here I was thinking that he was showing an actual interest in the condition of his Ace of The Cage (corporate nickname for our tiny little store)

Anyways, I guess the moral of the story is:  No matter how good you are at faking it, your cover can be blown by a well meaning human being that knows the truth.

The Official Kamen Rider Wiard Drink Game Rules!

You will need:

A shot of your favorite hard liquor
At least one beer.

First:  Do your shot (or in my case, a Geordie Bomb) at the opening credits.

Any time the driver says, "Please":  Take A Drink
A doughnut:  Take A Drink
"Saikyo~!!!!":  Take a Drink
Koyomi spotting a Phantom:  Take a Drink.

I've found that the Geordie Bomb (a boilermaker with Newcastle and Jagermeister, I know it sounds gross, but it's so creamy smooth and wonderful...try it, tell me different and I'll call you a liar) and then the rest of the bottle + 3/4ths of another bottle, is about how much your gonna drink in a 27 minute (or so) episode.  Be a boss, wait until the entire 2 episode arc has wrapped and then have a go with the game over the entire arc.  Guarantee you'll be drunk within an hour!